The Coffee Made Me Fat

It has come to my attention that my morning cup of joe is the cause of all my problems. ALL OF THEM. I know you think this is some slick hyperbolic statement formulated to grab your attention but hear me out…. I workout on a regular basis and I look pretty darn good if I

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This Fan Sucks on the Ground

Today’s Daily Writing Challenge was to write about the creation or invention of something. One of the suggestions was the ceiling fan. It was Florida. It was summer. It was humid. The rain had just ended and the moist air clung to the furniture, wrapped itself around the throats of everyone. The thought of human

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I’m An Embarrassment to My Mother and Women Everywhere

This, of course, is according to my mother. As most of you know, it is World Cup season. And as many of you also know, I have a problem with ladylike quiet. I am also a huge sports fan, an adrenaline junkie and a nut for competition. Combine all of these with my inner ear

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How Are My Tonsils Looking?

I know you probably haven’t met me in person, but if you had, I could probably ask you that question and you’d probably have an answer for me. The reason for this? I’m pretty damn sure I have an inner ear problem because I apparently can’t not talk loudly. According to various sources– some near and some

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Love The Fool

I must learn to love the fool in me – the one who feels too much, talks too much, takes too many chances, wins sometimes and loses often, lacks self-control, loves and hates, hurts and gets hurt, promises and breaks promises, laughs and cries.                    –Theodore Isaac

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Not Dead Yet

Hello Dear Reader, I’ve been away for quite some time, I know. I’d love to tell you that I was on some crazy adventure in some far off place and that I’ve returned baring pictures, learning experiences and possibly dreadlocks. I could tell you that I was thrown into prison by The Man during some

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