Modern-Day Fables

The Barnes and Noble People From Hell: A Rant

These people show up to the cafe section with their child– and before you scoff, I’ve got two children of my own– and you know what they do upon their arrival? Proceed to disrupt the thought processes of everyone around them.

I get it. People have got to eat. And people have got to keep their kids entertained. But, tell me, what sort of self-absorbed moron searches the bookshelves for a loud Animal Sounds book to hand a two year old before heading to the cafe?!

So here we all are, me writing, this one studying some textbook and taking notes, that one quietly reading. And every 3 seconds comes some abrasive thought-piercing pig, cow and monkey yelping it’s guts out. What happened to teaching children about quiet time? Consideration for others? It didn’t help that the two women were speaking almost as loudly as the book was belting.

By the way, does any parent not regret buying those noisy books immesiately after the purchase? The car ride home tends to be when regret sinks in. We don’t even make it to the house before we start cursing our utter lack of common sense and foresight. But back to the loonies…

In keeping with their vile lack of decorum, they left their table looking like every crumb of biscotti or whatever that had entered their mouth had promptly fallen out. I kid you not, the entire table looked as if a group of toddlers just had toast for brunch…

Now that I think of it, the child was the only thing about them that didn’t aggravate me. Poor kid.

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25 thoughts on “The Barnes and Noble People From Hell: A Rant”

  2. I was in a restaurant the other day, and ok, ok, it was a hole in the wall but this woman had her kids with her and they each had a squeaking, flashing, whizzing toy with them…… and I was like “I thought those toys were something that people who not-so-secretly hate you give to your kids for their birthdays and you “accidentally” throw them off the balcony onto their cars” I didn’t think that you kept them, brought them on a car ride, and then into a packed restaurant that probably isn’t going to pass it’s health inspection. Think people! Lol. Loved this Post Lady, you crack me up!
    https://damngirlgetyourshittogether.com/

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    1. You can call me Lyz (like Liz)☺ and you’re absolutely right! I think maybe all of the kids got the same kind of gift for a reason, but apparently it fell on deaf ears literally! She didn’t even realize they were trying to fuck her with those obnoxious toys 😂 because she’s equally obnoxious and oblivious. Ahh people. So many types of people in the world… Thanks for sharing darling. And eat somewhere that’ll pass inspection lol 😀

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  3. I can’t stand that. My parents taught me better and I wish parents these days would do the same! I once had a guy HIT ON ME while I was reading…like clearly I don’t want to talk to anyone or be interrupted. People can be so rude

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    1. Ohh the oblivious guy who tries to hit on you when you’re clearly busy. Like seriously guys! I’ll be riding my bike with headphones on and they think I’m going to stop for them as they shout goodness knows what at me, or worse drive along side me in their car. Did the guy ask you what you were reading at least?? 😅

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        1. Hahaha, good luck with that! You sound just like my cousin. She’s like “I can’t tolerate their noises!” Maybe you’ll luck out and have kids who are also naturally quiet; it’s possible, and dreaming costs nothing. 🙂

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  5. Like Barnes and Noble has this adorable “playplace” style section specifically for those obnoxious books with the noisy kids (or grown-ups)! What gives, ditching that for the quiet coffee place… :/ My deepest sympathies on the loss of basic decorum in the safest place (coffee-book-haven!) known to introverts worldwide.

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    1. Amy, I seriously wanted to flip a table gangster movie style. Option 2 was walking over, snatching the screeching books, tossing them to the ground and stepping on them. Basically, the entire scenario made me wish I was wish to be a gangster lol.

      I have kids and have high tolerance for noise and mess, but good grief! There’s a great coffee shop that I visit most times. We introverts especially love our coffee-book-havens. Nicely said.

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        1. You’re an idea gangster. You just own them woman! Coffee Shop Gangsters here we come. We’ll whack people across the head with books. Paperback for minor offenses, hardcover War and Peace for major ones.

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  6. I say you are justified.

    Becoming a parent has made me more tolerant of general kid silliness but I also find that I get more frustrated when in situations where parents aren’t, well, parenting. Like, when kids are running around making noise and their parents won’t even try to calm them down. If they at least tried, then I wouldn’t be as irritated.

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    1. Yes, absolutely Kerry. Kids aren’t robots that can be programmed but they can be trained/raised to a degree. It’s hard to become a parent and not grow more sympathetic to other parents, but I think effort is the important idea you’ve mentioned here. Make an effort to teach kids proper decorum! I wanted to go over there and raise those kids myself lol.

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  7. I don’t mind noise books, I find them hilarious (I think I’ve become immune to obnoxious noises thanks to work 😂) but definitely don’t give it to kids when you’re in a public area like a cafe where people come to relax. Are we talking really young kids here like under 3, or older? Cause if they’re older, they should be able to have interest in books without said obnoxious noises 😀

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    1. Believe me, as a middle school teacher, just walking through halls everyday has built my noise tolerance past most human limits lol. The kid was young, like 3. I blame the 2 women with him. They pulled it off a shelf and brought it to a quite area. That thing shouldn’t leave the kids book zone. But the 2 women were talking just as loud, if not louder than the book! I thought maybe we were all being pranked but no cameras came out from around any corners. 😅

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  8. Oh. My. Gosh! This is so relatable. For me I just feel like there is always that one person or couple of people wherever you go, that just have to do something nerve wrecking. Like they’ll do something so annoying and disturbing or unnecessary to the point where everyone would just stop what they are doing and stare at them for a good while. Although, no one actually does that because they don’t want to be caught staring at them. And they also would know who else would be staring and simply wouldn’t want to be caught up in that situation. Love this though.

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